Before I started my own coaching  business in 2019, I was a freelance writer for many years. I wrote my very first freelance newspaper article when I was 8 years old for the “Bear Essential News” in Tucson, Arizona. I published my first local newspaper article when I was 15 years old and still in high school. After that, I transitioned into magazine writing and fell in love with telling other people’s stories. 

In a way, I still do make a living crafting stories. As a Career Coach, I help other people tell the stories of their careers through resumes, CVs, LinkedIn, and cover letters. Which portions to highlight, what parts can be left out or consolidated, how to explain gaps in time or extreme pivots. 

Yet, there’s a reason why I’m so good at writing resumes and cover letters. Why can I find the words that other people are looking for? Because I had to learn how to do it for myself! 

As a freelancer, I was always “bouncing back” from one project ending and making a quick transition into a new project or new gig. Balancing multiple projects while still holding down a day job. So, job search and interviewing became second nature to me. I learned how to highlight my strengths and recognize yet work on my perceived weaknesses. I developed a very thick skin for hearing a “no, not right now” when applying for jobs. And, I honed my negotiation skills every time and on every project, steadily earning more than the last time. 

I have become a Career Coach because I love what I do. I enjoy helping people make the transition and job change they’ve been dreaming about for years–to finally make it a reality. Every day, I get to help people find clarity and tell their stories in a way that feels authentic to them. 

But, I didn’t always have this confidence. I used to doubt myself, doubt my capabilities, and even doubt my own dreams. 

There is something you should know:  I’ve been fired before (twice!) Both times it  shattered my confidence.  I’ve also quit jobs with little notice (not proud of this one). I’ve turned down decent job offers. I’ve filed for unemployment and utilized it for a time. I’ve taken temporary jobs and side gigs.  

For me, even the time when it was my “own fault” for getting fired, it actually wasn’t all my fault. The first time, I was part of a toxic work environment that offered promises of upward mobility with no intention of ever giving a fair shot.  I put so many unrealistic expectations on myself to get it all done and do it perfectly that I didn’t know how to ask for help when I was drowning in too much work until it was too late. The second time, I now know that it was simply a matter of a company's culture that was not in alignment with my own personal and professional values. Plus my boss was a (capital M) Micro-manager  who also somehow gave no specific direction and I was a people-pleaser with the inability to speak up for myself and my co-workers. Everyone involved had terrible boundaries around remote work. 

In both situations, I lost my motivation to work because I felt under-valued as an employee and I was already experiencing burnout long before I stopped responding to emails. 

Was that the ideal move? No, of course not, but it was the only way I knew how to communicate that something was wrong at the time.  

Now being wiser, I would have set better boundaries and heeded the red flag warning signs. If I had listened to my intuition, I probably would not have accepted either job. But, I did learn some valuable lessons about myself: 

1. I care about the vision and actions of the organization 

2. I don’t vibe with startup environment, I actually like structure 

3. I am an “all-in” kind of person, employee, and creative

4. I actually enjoy working for myself the most (entrepreneurship!) 

Both of those “bad” work experiences showed me a that if I am going to work for an organization, I need to believe whole-heartedly in what they are doing.I need/crave/like some form of structure and don’t do well in a start-up environment where the plan is always changing and the  goal post is always moving.  It also showed me that I put my whole self (identity, pride, creativity, energy) into the work that I do–especially writing. And, it led me to explore the idea of “working for myself” rather than “working for the man.” Without having experienced those terrible jobs, it may have taken me even longer to discover that I have an entrepreneurial spirit and actually excel at the work that I do. 

In addition to my own personal and professional experience with this, I’ve also helped my husband and partner as he’s navigated the disbelief of being let go from a job for speaking his mind. I’ve given advice and offered support to friends and family as they shift and change careers.. And, I’ve helped hundreds of candidates as they deal with the shock of being laid off. I”ve helped job seekers muster the courage to give their notice and move on from companies they’ve been loyal to for 15+ years. No matter what the situation is, there is always a dark time of the unknown where it feels at the minimum uncomfortable and at maximum, unbearable. But the common thread for all of these instances is that there is always an upswing. The fog always lifts and the sky becomes brighter. Every, single, time. 

The point I’m getting at here, is that even though it can feel like the end of the world when we get fired, let go, laid off, or even quit a job…it’s actually not. The scars of what we went through become part of our career story.  We have to trust that the journey we’re on will lead us to where we’re actually meant to be. 

If you’re “in it” right now and that sounds like bull, then I understand. Take a few weeks to really feel it. Grieve it. Mourn the loss of what could have/should have been. Feel the anger. Be pissed. Cry. Like, actually sob. Yell into the screen. Then, give yourself a big hug. It’s okay!

And when you’re ready to start healing, come on out. It’s better and brighter than it ever was before. You and your talents, and your magic were able to land you that last opportunity. This time, you can attract something even better because you are more clear on what you will and won’t tolerate. You are wiser. You are more willing to listen to yourself and trust your own intuition. You are ready to level-up in a way that is super meaningful for your life and your career. 

Make time for what  you actually want to be doing (cooking healthy dinners, going for walks, writing in a journal).  Take the actions when you can to move you forward (updating that resume, reaching out to connections on LinkedIn, applying for jobs you actually want). And the job search and job interviews will fall into place. The opportunities that you’re now ready for will come to you more easily. 

Trust me on this one. 

Did you enjoy this article? Reach out and let me know–what’s one thing you can do right now to feel better and more confident in your own skin?

This article was originally published on LinkedIn by the author Jennifer Anne Garcia in January 2024.